Now us two c***s know a few things about camping. We’ve set
up tents in gardens, campsites, on roadside verges and at festivals around the
world. Practise makes perfect and we’ve got it down to a seriously fine art – 3
minutes is the record and I swear the tent wasn’t a pop-up (scouts honour). But
nothing makes the whole process fall apart quicker than camping with the
uninitiated…
Two lovely friends from my adventures in the UK had promised to come visit now that I was back home in South Africa and one slightly drunken evening credit cards were maxed out as they booked their flights and made true on their promise. Back in London they oscillated between excitement and panic, and were suckered into every vaccination available. Here in South Africa, the two c***s teamed up to create an itinerary to make any spread sheet using, ahead-of-time planner mist up with pride: A whip around of the people and places of Jozi, the traditional Cape Town experience and the pièce de résistance – four days in the Kruger Park. But they’d be doing it our way…which means camping.
And fuck me sideways if they didn't return home with memories that regaled pub-goers for weeks after. The drive up from Joburg was suitably potholed and teeming with crazed truck drivers, taxis and livestock that we dodged whilst they gripped their hand rests and checked their seatbelts. They experienced creepy crawlies and semi-deflated air mattresses. And on a particular morning learned about ablution-block etiquette when they emerged from a 40 minute shower to be met with a long queue of annoyed ladies who were waiting their turn.
But there is
something spectacular in catching a glimpse of Africa through the eyes of
someone who has never even imagined how it could be. Their delight in the
deliciousness that is food cooked over a campfire, while you swig coffee laced
with Amarula; or the excitement that every zebra, impala and warthog elicited.
They inhaled every sunrise and sunset and sat silent, for the first time, in
wonder as we watched a cheetah softly pad across the sandy road and disappear
into long grass.
In fact it was
enough to forgive the wasp-in-car hysteria that kicked off in the midst of a
herd of elephants that could have seen the trip end in less-than-desirable circs...
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| Worth a 4am wake up call? |
